What does “home” mean to you? Where is your “home”?

Recently I have witnessed many opportunities to “stay home” and a sense of peace when I “go home”. When I think about all the ways we are being asked to “be home” to work, learn, and get well, I wonder what it would be like if we took time to reflect on our values and our health (mental and physical and financial) intentionally while we are “at home”?

What if we started to realize that we have what we need in this moment?

Outside there is a blizzard blowing on 1/29/2022. I can feel and hear the wind howling and the waves crashing. Inside I have taken stock, water, fire, plugged in my devices. The stress of a storm like this is felt in my body and heart. What about the people who are not as fortunate? What about my loved ones who may loose power?

Those fears are real and they are just that, the fear of uncertainty.

What home means to me:

When I go “home” I get present. I stop what I am doing and I trust.

It’s a “place” within me and a “place” to be me.

I have spent the past 5 years moving and exploring new places. It was a great adventure. I let go of a lot of “things” and felt a new sense of freedom. And at certain times along the way I felt compelled to “go home”. However, I didn’t have a physical home. I had temporary homes where I could “be”. This uncertainty caused me to have a new perspective on my life and gain more curiosity about what and where I wanted my physical home to be.

A few years ago I took a job as a Traveling Speech Language Pathologist and went out to California to work and live. I had a very rich experience of being in a new place, meeting new people and getting to know a little more of who I was and what I wanted. As a traveler I needed to have a home base. That was Maine. I moved there in 2014 after living in Vermont for 34 years! 22 of those years living on the same road! One day I realized it was time to go somewhere else and live closer to my daughter who was newly married.

When I was in California I would “come home” for the holidays and summer break. One summer I spent visiting friends and family. It was amazing, I had so much fun with a sense of freedom and I learned a lot about myself once again.

When my daughter gave birth to her third child, I made the decision to “settle down” closer to her in Maine. Where did I want my new “home to be”? I had discovered Chebeague Island back a few years and actually was interested in buying a home there and the transaction did not work out. So then I decided to move to take time to travel in California. There were no other homes available for rent or sale at that time.

Then, out of the blue, while working in CA, I got a call from a friend asking me if I wanted to come to Chebeague because her cottage was available. The timing was perfect and I knew it was where I wanted to go and be! I went! I am still here 2 years later!

While I have been on Chebeague, I have moved my “home” 7 times. Throughout this time I shifted. I shifted my thinking and my language. I took my home with me! Each place I went I realized “my home” was inside of me and I had everything I needed and was surrounded by all the resources I need and a community where I felt “at home”.

I believe everything aligns in your life when you find your “home” within yourself. At that point you can find your “physical home/house/cottage/condo/apartment, etc” and really settle down. Sometimes we stay in our physical house so we can feel safe and have a place that is certain. When your home is inside and outside, that’s a special time.

My experiences over the last 12 years have been rich and caused me to grow. Along the way I also reflected on what my “home” was as a child” Who was there, what did it feel like and how did I want to make my next home similar or different. Someday I will write more about that. Right now I am missing my belongings which include pictures and items that I have been bringing with me from “home to home”. Right now they are cozily stored in a storage unit, waiting for me to lay my hands and eyes on them. I can’t wait to show them my new “home” and “be with them again”.

It’s time for me to introduce my “home” to the place where it will live and be in alignment!

Are you coming or going home?

The pandemic has created an environment of questioning and constant change.

Where can we go?

When can we go?

Who can we be with?

What do we need?

How to prepare for going out?

All of these questions are part of the uncertainty and create a new level of self-awareness.

So recently talking with a friend over a period of time I watched as she came to the conclusion that she wanted to go from a place of being away to “back where her home is”. That also being back where loved ones are.

When I think about “home” I think about a place and a state where I feel grounded and connected. By grounded I mean a sense of safety and community. Where I know people, who to call when I need something and also where I can be of service.

I also think of home as a place where I can be myself, and by myself sometimes. Where I recognize familiar items and comforts.

What does “being home” mean to you?

Sometimes periods of sustained life changes and possibly this “pandemic” are causing a sense of frantic energy, people wanting to “do” things that they are used to doing, sometimes for others and sometimes for themselves. These opportunities are also a time to “press pause” and learn how to be with the feelings of uncertainty and getting comfortable with the the notion of being vs. doing.

So where do you feel at “home”?

What does home feel like for you?

What can you do at home to make it feel more “homey”?

When we leave “home” it is a gift to recognize that we have a “home” to come back to.

As the blizzard continues to blow and the whitecap’s enlarge on the bay, I just needed to jump up from the couch where I am typing this to create a new draft in the wood stove as the wind outside is influencing the wind inside. So, although I am in my physical home, I need to go back to my emotional and spiritual home to stay calm so I can make safe decisions and stay present for the ever quickly changing gusts of wind and uncertainty.

I remember that “home is where the heart is!” This photo was taken in my first apartment after leaving my “home” in Vermont after 22 years. I can’t wait to reunite with my “heart” !

I am thinking about bringing self made “retreats” into homes so people can feel more grounded:

Retreats to develop practices for Self Care

Yoga/Mindfulness/Thai Chi

Book discussions/study

Cooking and Meal design

Affirmations for being at home

Time management for Being vs Doing

Which areas interest you? Is there a topic that isn’t there that you wish was?

Connect with me at jessiegrahamcoach@gmail.com

Home; Go Home, Come Home, Be Home, Stay Home… So many ways to think about it!