Coaching Concept: The Power of “And”
Over the past year I have made a conscious effort to make sure that I use the word “and” instead of “or” and “but”. This awareness came when closely examining how paradox was such an integral part of my life. Not sure how this all happened. Maybe my age, wisdom, or healing. It is powerful. The Google Definition: “a seemingly absurd or self-contradictory statement or proposition that when investigated or explained may prove to be well founded or true: "in a paradox, he has discovered that stepping back from his job has increased the rewards he gleans from it”. A common statement I hear these days is “ less is more”.
When solving a problem we consider possibilities. So, options need to be added, not limited. So when creating a “to do” list, focus on the idea that you get to do this “and” that. Instead of “having to”. It takes the pressure off, and makes each item a choice and gives a sense of completion of things you want to do.
When learning something new and applying it to life, say it out loud. “I finally figured out how to do ____ and now I will do _____.” In this case use “and” instead of the words “so now”. It feels like an added bonus!
And, when considering desires, and co-creating change in life the word “and” is most powerful. Have you ever had the idea that you can only have X if you give up Y? You have to choose the green dress or the red dress? Well what if you could have both? Or you could find a green and red dress! When considering your life choices, in the areas of career/job, homes or relationships, make sure you include those things you are not sure you can have but really want. I desired a cottage and I wanted to be on the water. I needed to focus on both the cottage AND the water view. And that focus lead me right to where I wanted to be!
When you realize that you often have “mixed” emotions and there are more than one coming up simultaneously or sequentially connect feelings and emotions and your experience will be authentic. Have you ever been nervous and excited at the same time? How about sad and jealous? And relieved and happy? And, then the experience is real!
And, you CAN have all things that you want, the cottage and the location! The food and the friends. The beach and the snow!
If you would like to explore this coaching concept further contact me for an Introductory Coaching Call.